Seasons...

I was reflecting on the season that Roy and I have been in for the past couple years. We've been through some pretty tough stuff.  Thinking about the difficult trials we have endured spawned memories of my battle with illness of all kinds that I walked around with for far too long due to an undiagnosed disease a number of years ago. I suffered multiple physical illnesses, mental and emotional illness and spiritual illness.  I had thyroid disease (later discovered to be Hashimoto's), Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Bipolar Disorder, Panic Attacks and an underlying disease that nobody suspected.  I was tested for all kinds of things until one day the connection was made.  I had Celiac Disease.  During that difficult time in my life, I went through horrible spiritual oppression. Demonic attacks from the pit of hell plagued me.  I recently had a small episode that instilled fear in me that I knew I couldn't bear again.  I started repeating the name of Jesus, and the attack dissipated. The positive thing I have on my side now is spiritual growth, and the knowledge of how to handle these attempts by the devil to thwart my walk with Christ.  Another thing it reminded me of is the simple fact that he never gives up! It is Satan's mission to try and destroy Christians and the family unit.  He rocked our marriage when I was sick, and he's rocking our family now.  Please pray for us that God would bring healing and restoration, and that blinders that need to fall off would fall.  Pray that the strongholds the devil has in place would come crashing down.  We want relationships restored properly.  It's never fun as a parent to go through tough times with your children.  I know God has a plan, and it is perfect. It's just hard to see right now.

Seasons of difficulty and struggle are the things God uses to bring us to a closer, much more dependant relationship with Him.  I know for me He wanted my trust and my adoring love.  Faith is challenging.  It's hard feeling like you are drowning in wave after wave knowing you need to just reach out and take the Father's hand. He's right there.......waiting.  It's not hard for Him.  It's hard for us.  We have ourselves to hurdle over.  That's it.  We are the obstacle to our own failures or the stepping stone to our own triumphs.  He's just right there patiently waiting, encouraging, reaching and, yes, sometimes even disciplining.   I love how He loves me.  I love that He loves me so much He allowed me to go through some of the most hellish, difficult times ever to bring me closer to Him so I could know how He loves me.  I thank God for trials for without them I would not know the depth of His grace, mercy and LOVE for me!  It is my desire that God is always glorified in my weaknesses and in my tribulations.  Like Paul, I want to share my weaknesses and struggles with others so that Christ's power can work through me, and that He can use me to be a blessing to someone else who needs to know that He loves and cares for them!

2 Corinthins 12:9, "But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.



Love,
Me :)